Can a relationship with a backyard animal evolve from cuisine to companion?
Joseph Mackereth
If y’all know anything by now, it’s that the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia has more than its fair share of colorful people. When I say colorful, I am using my grandmother’s polite euphemism. The range on that color wheel is anywhere from entertainingly eccentric to a concerned, “Earl, do you need help paying for your meds this month?”
And that brings me to an elderly widower who lives in my neighborhood. He stays to himself, hardly ever venturing outside. He’s an acquaintance, not a friend, but still he’s a neighbor. Being a neighbor earns him a wave from me if I’m in the yard, or a head-tilt-hey-there if I’m in the car.
Greetings from behind the wheel of a vehicle have a hierarchy, you know. If the other driver is unknown to you, they get an index finger raised while the rest of the fingers continue to grip the wheel. The more familiarity you have with the person in the other car, the more fingers get raised in greeting. If you’re neighbors or friends, you give them the old head tilt plus four raised fingers. That’s as friendly as it can get at 45 miles per hour on a back road. That my friends, is the head-tilt-hey-there.
Well, this guy shocked us all when he went and bought himself a goat. I mean, this is a goat-owning county but I would not have pegged this guy as a ready candidate for animal husbandry. Ostensibly, he bought the goat to eat all the weeds along his tree line and then in the fall, the goat was going to be with Jesus via a propane grill and some barbecue sauce. For him to have any animals at all is noteworthy. Not even a barn cat wanders his property.
Because the goat was destined to be temporary, my neighbor referred to it as Entrée. As goats go, Entrée is a fine example of her breed. She’s mostly brown with black ears and tail, and just a few thumb prints of white to keep it interesting. Entrée is a common Nubian goat, perfectly agreeable to munch through the day keeping weeds and vines managed in areas that a mower just couldn’t reach. At night, Entrée retires to a 10’ x 10’ dog pen and sleeps on top of her house. My neighbor had to put a roof on the pen because Entrée’s hobby is to bust out of the enclosure.
That brings me back to my Grandma. She used to say if a fence couldn’t hold water, it couldn’t hold a goat. She certainly knew about them, since she’d grown up caring for milk goats. My own mother was no more than five when she taught her pet goat, Howdy, to play Red Light Green Light. My mother’s recollection was that Howdy was phenomenal at the game, perhaps even possessing Olympian skill. Howdy also escaped the pasture every day like it was on his chore list. Goats. What’re you going to do?
So my non-animal neighbor has a goat named Entrée that is part of his life now. In fact, it appears that they are becoming fast friends. How do I know? He’s changed her name to Emily. He said calling her Entrée was a real disincentive to her work ethic. Have to keep her motivated. He said Emily suits her better. Said she looks like an Emily. She does have very soulful eyes and she knows how to use them to charm humans, obviously. Okay. I can see calling her Emily.
My neighbor has pulled a lawn chair over beside the dog pen. Has his morning coffee with Emily. Visits with her before going to bed. Emily’s chances of meeting Jesus in the fall are fading by the minute.
I have witnessed a couple of events recently which convince me that Miss Emily Entrée has moved in for good. One, my neighbor has lined the back seat of his car with blankets and taught Emily that if she rides quietly while they run errands she’ll get an ice cream cone from the drive-through. Two, I saw this man sitting outside in the blistering heat of summer wearing nothing but his underwear with his feet dangling in a kiddie pool he’d fill with water so Emily could get some relief from the temperature. They appeared to be having a serious conversation.
Who knew an Entrée could truly be food for the soul?
The story above appears in our July / August 2020 issue. For more subscribe today or log in to the digital edition with your active digital subscription. Thank you for your support!